Momma's Boy

As a nurse, it is not uncommon to have some mildly crazy people walk into your life once in a while. As a nurse named Andy, this tends to happen way too often.

One night, we received a male patient who had been close to ODing on all sorts of drugs. The type of guy that would smoke a teddy bear if it could get him high.

OD patients are renowned for being very difficult and they usually RHT (Refuse Hospital Treatment). This guy came to the ward, screaming and shouting at the nurse transferring him over. We managed to get him into bed and put up a drip. A couple hours later, after walking the hallway searching for ghosts, I saw a trail of blood. I followed the trail like I was a fat Gretel following a trail of Jelly Tots and it led me to the entrance of the ward and our lovely patient trying to escape. I might add that he was pulling on the door that said "PUSH".

The smart ass had ripped his drip out, not realizing that he would leave a trail of blood apparently. He continued to be extremely uncooperative and we couldn't find an awake and functioning doctor to prescribe sedation. So, we did the next best thing.. We called security.

Within 5 minutes, we had ten burly security guards in the ward. The short, skinny patient started shouting insults at the guards. Bad idea. After some manhandling, the patient started screaming that he wanted his "mommy".

I managed to track down "mommy" and she came into the ward. The patient embraced her for a long time and then started yelling insults at her too. He really doesn't learn.

The highlight of my night was when he started asking if his "mommy" could stay overnight with him. I had heard it all! At this stage, I had better things to do with my time, like making a Cup-a-Soup. Later, I realized I hadn't seen or heard from the patient or "mommy". This time, my investigation led me to find him and his mom squeezed into the tiny bed together, spooning. Talk about a close relationship. Now, I had seen everything too.